Escape to Paradise: Hotel Etno Selo Awaits in Bosnia!
Escape to Paradise: Hotel Etno Selo Awaits in Bosnia! (Or, My Chaotic Balkan Adventure)
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because I’m about to unload on you about my recent – and frankly, utterly delightful – stay at Hotel Etno Selo in Bosnia. Forget perfectly polished travel blogs; this is going to be the REAL DEAL. I’m talking raw emotion, questionable decisions fueled by delicious local wine, and enough detail to make you feel like you actually were there, dodging stray cats and desperately trying to understand Bosnian.
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First things first: Accessibility. (Ugh, starting with the boring stuff, I know, I know. But it is important, especially since I’m still trying to figure out how to get my suitcase past a particularly stubborn cobblestone). The website claimed to be accessible, and honestly, the hotel made a good effort. There are elevators (hallelujah!), and they've put thought into facilities for guests with mobility issues. I did see a few ramps, and the staff were generally helpful when I needed it (though sometimes the language barrier was a hilarious obstacle. More on that later.) However, it wasn't a completely perfect experience. Some areas, like the walkways between the charming, traditional houses that make up the Selo (village), were a bit uneven, but overall, they made a decent effort at inclusion.
Internet, Internet, Everywhere…Mostly!
Okay, so internet. We NEED it, right? Especially when you're trying to Instagram your epic Balkan adventure. Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! That was their boast, and it rang true… MOST of the time. There were moments, like when I was desperately trying to video call my mom to show off the swimming pool, where the connection decided to take a leisurely vacation. It made me appreciate the little things (like the fact I could actually SEE my family for a moment). In the public areas, the Wi-Fi worked like champ, I could get by, but in my room, bless its heart, sometimes I had to resort to the "stand outside the window furiously waving the phone" method. They also mentioned Internet [LAN], which, frankly, I didn't even bother with. Too much effort. I'm a Wi-Fi kind of gal. Did I mention the Internet Services they offered? I think they meant, "we have internet services!" which is all I needed to hear.
Speaking of Paradise…
The things to do were fantastic. Seriously, it’s called “Etno Selo” for a reason: it feels like stepping back in time. Rustic charm oozes from every crooked doorway. And the ways to relax? DANG. The pool with a view? Absolutely stunning. Picture this: you, a cocktail, and mountains that stretch out forever. Pure bliss. I spent a shameful amount of time just floating around, trying to become one with the water and the serenity.
And the Spa! Oh, the spa. They had it all: a sauna, a steamroom, and a whole host of massages. I went for the “deep tissue, please, I think I walked up too many hills this morning." The masseuse, bless her heart, didn’t speak a lick of English. But the pain-relieving pressure? Universal language. The Body scrub and Body wrap were tempting, but honestly, I was too busy stuffing my face with delicious food to commit to a full-blown spa day.
Cleanliness and Safety: Making Sure My Hand Sanitizer Didn't Go to Waste.
In a post-pandemic world (or, you know, still during the pandemic, let's be real), cleanliness is key. I was pleasantly surprised. The hotel took hygiene seriously. They had hand sanitizer everywhere. Daily disinfection in common areas? Check. Rooms sanitized between stays? Hopefully! My room was spotless when I arrived. There's a first aid kit in case you get too adventurous with the local rakija (trust me, it happens). They even provided individually-wrapped food options, which, again, felt reassuring. They took a lot of steps to make things healthy and safe, and while they did a lot, I’m not sure I saw any Anti-viral cleaning products specifically. Also, they had a doctor or nurse on call, which sounded nice, but I didn't need.
Food Glorious Food (And Drink, Because, Duh!)
The food… MY GOODNESS. Bosnian cuisine is hearty, delicious, and guaranteed to loosen those belt buckles. The A la carte in restaurant was tempting especially, as was the buffet, but the buffet was where it was at. I went for the Breakfast [buffet] every single morning. We're talking fresh bread, local cheeses, eggs cooked to order, and enough pastries to make me regret everything I ate for at least the next three days.
Also, there were lots of Restaurants that offered lots of food. The restaurant staff were generally brilliant, even if I had to use my hands to order (thanks to my lack of Bosnian). The International cuisine in restaurant was there, too, but I'm all for the local stuff. I even tried the Asian cuisine in restaurant, which was… surprisingly good!
The Bar? Don't even get me started. They had a poolside bar, perfect for sipping cocktails while soaking up the sun. And the Happy hour? Let me just say, I made some new very enthusiastic friends during happy hour. There were also Coffee/tea in restaurant, a Coffee shop, and a Snack bar in there. I think they had everything I could possibly ask for.
Services and Conveniences: Making Life Easier (and More Fun)
From the moment I arrived, the staff were incredibly friendly and helpful. The Front desk [24-hour] made everything easy. They had Concierge services, a Currency exchange, and even a Gift/souvenir shop (which I may have frequented once or twice… or three times… for those little trinkets you can't leave without). Daily housekeeping kept my room pristine, even after I'd managed to mess it up again every day. The elevator was a lifesaver, especially with my overpacked suitcase. They provided Laundry service, which was a blessing because, let's be honest, I wasn't exactly packing light. There was also a Car park [free of charge].
For the Kids (and the Kid in Me):
While I didn't have any kids with me, it was definitely a Family/child friendly environment. They had Babysitting service, and the staff were clearly great with children. I even saw some kids having the time of their lives in the pool.
The Room: My Cozy Balkan Castle
My room? Honestly, it was perfect. It had Air conditioning (a must in the Bosnian summer!), a desk (which I never used, because, vacation), and an in-room safe box, which I still don't fully trust (but used anyway). The Free bottled water was a lifesaver, and the complimentary tea was a lovely touch. The Bed was extra long and comfortable, the blackout curtains blocked out the sun so I could sleep in, and the shower was a welcome place to wash away the day's adventures. They even had bathrobes - I lived in mine! The Window that opens was a welcome addition, especially, when the A/C failed at 3:00 in the morning.
Now for the juicy bits, the imperfections, the stream-of-consciousness rambling!
Okay, so here's the REAL talk. Despite all the amazing things, there were a few… quirks.
The Language Barrier: A Comedy of Errors. I tried. I really did. I even attempted to learn a few phrases in Bosnian (Sprechen Sie Deutsch? Na, not in this Balkans adventure). But, bless their hearts, the staff generally spoke Bosnian and maybe a smidge of English. This lead to some hilarious misunderstandings. I tried to order a "small coffee" and ended up with a double espresso. I asked for directions and ended up being walked halfway across the village. It was all part of the experience, really.
The Cobblestone Conundrum. As mentioned earlier, while there were ramps and elevators, getting around the village itself wasn't always easy. Those charming cobblestone paths? Adorable. Wheelchair-friendly? Not so much. It wasn't a complete dealbreaker, but it's something to consider if you rely heavily on accessibility.
The Occasional Wi-Fi Hiccup. Ok, sometimes that darn Wi-Fi would randomly decide to go on a break. The frustration! The desperation! The urge to scream into the void! But in the end, who needs the internet when you have stunning views and delicious food?
The Lack of the "Perfect" Map. Maybe it's just me, but even with all the amenities, I would have
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because we're about to get REAL about Hotel Etno Selo Herceg Medjugorje. This isn't your sanitized travel brochure, this is the chaotic symphony of my brain trying to wrangle a trip I took there. And, spoiler alert: it was a mixed bag… a delicious, sun-drenched, slightly-overcooked mixed bag.
Medjugorje Mayhem: A Totally Unofficial Itinerary (and my inner monologue)
Day 1: Arrival & Initial Culture Shock (followed by a desperate plea for coffee)
- Morning (ish): Landed in Split, Croatia. Pretty standard airport stuff. Except, you know, the usual sweaty jostle for baggage, the existential dread that sets in when you realize you’re actually thousands of miles from everything you know, and the slightly-too-bright-to-handle Croatian sun. Found the pre-arranged transfer to Hotel Etno Selo. The driver, a burly dude named Ivan, smoked like a chimney and blasted what I think was Croatian polka music. (Honestly, it all blurred together after the third cigarette.)
- Inner Monologue: "Okay, deep breaths. You're in the Balkans. Embrace the chaos. Just… maybe not the chain-smoking so early in the morning. Ugh, I need caffeine. Desperately. And a map. I think?"
- Afternoon: Arrived at Etno Selo. First impression? Wow. Just…wow. Picture a super-Instagrammable village, all stone buildings, cobbled streets, and flowers spilling over balconies. Seriously, someone should teach me how to take proper photos. It was breathtakingly beautiful. And then…the realization hit. It was hot. Like, scorch-the-eyeballs hot. And I was already regretting my decision to pack mostly black clothing.
- Anecdote: Check-in was…interesting. The receptionist, bless her heart, was trying her best with English, bless her heart. I think my reservation was…somewhere… I showed the receptionist my reservation on my phone. It takes a while, the more you look around at the hotel, and think about the life and the beauty of the area.
- Late Afternoon/Early Evening: Settled into my room (rustic charm, a.k.a. "needs a serious air conditioner"). Explored the "village." Found the restaurant and ordered a big coffee, just to start my day. And I should. Walk around more. I'm tired.
Day 2: The "Pilgrimage" & the Pizza (and the impending existential dread)
- Morning: The main event: Medjugorje itself. Now, listen, I'm not religious. I went with an open mind. I was interested. The energy there is undeniable. It was a little hard to get around. And I wasn't sure who was a tourist and who wasn't. Not easy for a clueless idiot like me. It was a hot, sun-baked, crowded walk up Apparition Hill. The line to touch the statue of the Virgin Mary was epic.
- Quirky Observation: There's a lot of souvenir shopping. A truly dizzying array of Virgin Mary tchotchkes. I ended up buying a small, slightly-chipped wooden cross. Partly because it called to me, and partly because I felt bad for the shop owner.
- Emotional Reaction: A weird, intense feeling. I felt a bit overwhelmed, a bit…moved. But I also just wanted a bottle of water and a shaded bench
- Afternoon: Back at Etno Selo. The best pizza was absolutely delicious. I mean, seriously good. Huge. Fresh ingredients. Cooked in an actual wood-fired oven. I might have embarrassingly over-ordered. And that was totally okay.
- Doubling Down on Experience: I spent about an hour by the pool, nursing a beer and replaying the morning in my head. It's not often you get such a mix of spirituality and just total absurdity. I loved it; I hated it. It was me.
- Evening: Dinner at the restaurant again. Wandered around the village. The stars at night… magical.
Day 3: Winding Down (and Maybe Going Slightly Crazy)
- Morning: Did absolutely nothing. Slept late. Ate breakfast at a leisurely pace. Strolled (slowly, in the sweltering heat) around the village again. I felt like I was going a little crazy. Maybe a lot. This is more than a place.
- Messy Structure/Rambles: I sat by the pool, trying to read, but mostly just staring at the mountains. The heat had melted my brain. The world seemed…different. The sheer beauty of everything felt a bit like a cosmic joke. I wanted to scream. And the idea of having to pack up my bag again…
- Afternoon: A massage at the hotel spa. A desperate attempt to unclench every muscle in my body. It helped, kinda.
- Opinionated Language: The spa was a little…tired-looking. The massage oil smelled suspiciously of something vaguely medicinal. But hey, at least the masseuse knew how to push all the right buttons.
- Evening: Last dinner. More pizza (yes, I know). Said goodbye to the stone walls, the flowers, and the…the vibe of the place.
Day 4: Departure & Final Thoughts (Plus Maybe Another Plea for Coffee)
Morning: The transfer to Split. Polka music. Another cigarette. The familiar swirl of exhaustion and wistful longing.
Afternoon: Goodbye Medjugorje. Goodbye Etno Selo, and goodbye to the chaos!!
Final Thoughts: Would I go back? Maybe. The place has a hold on you. It was…a lot. The food was great. The people were cool. And the feeling of being immersed in something so… intense? That's something you can't get anywhere else.
- Emotional Reaction: I need. Coffee. And therapy. But yeah, I'd recommend it. Just…prepare yourself. It's going to be wild.
Escape to Paradise: Hotel Etno Selo Awaits in Bosnia! (FAQ – With a Side of Chaos)
Alright, so you're thinking about Etno Selo. Good choice! Or maybe… well, let's just say it *could* be a good choice. Before you book, strap in, because this isn't your average FAQ. I'm serving up the real deal, warts and all. I practically *lived* there for a blissful(ish) week last year, and trust me, I have OPINIONS.
1. What *is* Etno Selo, exactly? Like, beyond the pretty pictures?
Okay, picture this: a charming, slightly rustic village, plucked straight from a fairytale, nestled in the Bosnian countryside. Think little wooden houses, cobbled streets, the whole shebang. They call it "Ethno Village," and the idea is to give you a taste of traditional Bosnian life. Now, the "taste" can range from delicious to… let's say "authentically rustic." It's a beautiful place, no doubt. But beauty, my friends, has its price. And sometimes that price involves questionable plumbing.
Honestly, it's less "Disneyland Bosnian Edition" and more "Grandma's slightly rundown cottage, but in the best possible way."
2. Are the rooms actually *nice*? Because I have standards... some of them, anyway..
This is where things get interesting. They *look* amazing. Think exposed beams, cozy fireplaces, and that romantic "lived-in" vibe. And some are. I mean, my first room was… a disaster. Mold, a leaky faucet that sounded like a dying walrus, and a view of a particularly grumpy-looking donkey. I'm not kidding about the donkey. He judged me. Constantly.
BUT! After a *firm* word with the front desk (who were actually super helpful, in a chaotic kind of way), I got moved. The second room? Heaven. Absolutely stunning. So, the moral of the story: If you're not happy, SPEAK UP. They'll try to fix it. Probably.
3. What's the food like? Because, let's be honest, a holiday without good food is a tragedy.
Oh. My. Goodness. The food. Okay, deep breath. It's… fantastic. Truly. Bosnian cuisine is hearty, flavorful, and unapologetically delicious. Think cevapcici (grilled minced meat – *divine*), burek (savory pastry – *to die for*), and mountains of fresh bread. I practically gained five pounds in the first two days. Worth it. Every single bite.
The breakfasts, though… bless. Standard breakfast. But the restaurant dinners were an absolute highlight. Sometimes I just sat there, staring at the food, wondering how I’d manage to eat it all.
Side note: Be prepared for the occasional language barrier. Ordering can involve a lot of pointing and smiling. "This... yes, this! And the… other thing that looks delicious!" Works every time.
4. Can I get wifi? I have Instagram to maintain! (Priorities, people!)
Ah, the modern traveler's lament. Yes, there *is* wifi. But… let's just say it’s “rustic wifi”. Picture dial-up, but worse. Much, much worse. I'm talking "Upload a photo? Okay, see you tomorrow!" kind of speeds. Embrace the digital detox, my friends. Read a book. Talk to people. Look up at the stars. (They're spectacular, by the way.) Consider the wifi as a delightful distraction. You'll thank me later.
5. What is there to *do*? Or is it just, you know, existing?
Okay, so this is where the "escape" part comes in. Etno Selo is all about chilling. But do not worry, there are some things to do. There are some lovely hikes, for example. We went with a local guide, and he told us about the history and local legends. The scenery is gorgeous! You can sit by the pool with a book, but be careful, the sun is intense in summer. There's a wellness center. (I didn't try it but hear wonderful things.) The restaurant had live music some night and the local rakija is always a good idea.
The thing is, this is a perfect place to completely switch off. If you are addicted to the high speed city life, It might be a shock. But eventually, you will learn to love the slow pace of life.
6. Is it *truly* an escape? I'm worried about crowds and tourists!
This is one of Etno Selo's biggest wins! You are off the beaten path. You find a real calmness and quiet without any mass tourism. The sense of peace is real. You will be able to completely relax and unwind. It truly feels like you are in the middle of nowhere. I thought the escape was amazing! Maybe don't plan to go during peak season.
7. Okay, alright, you've painted a picture. But the donkey! The mold! The leaky faucet! Was it *worth* it?
Good Lord, yes. Absolutely, unequivocally, YES. Despite the wonky plumbing, the occasional wifi meltdown, and the judgmental gaze of that donkey (I swear he was judging my choice of breakfast cereal), Etno Selo was magic. The beauty of the place, the warmth of the people, the *food*... it all just washes over you. It's a place to disconnect, to breathe, to actually *live*.
It’s not perfect. It's rough around the edges. It's… real. And that, my friends, is exactly why it's so good.
Would I go back? In a heartbeat. But first, I'm definitely bringing earplugs for the donkey.
8. Do you have any advice for a first-timer?
Pack comfortable shoes for cobblestone streets. Bring bug spray - nature is present. Embrace the slow pace. Learn a few basic Bosnian phrases (it's polite, and fun!). Be prepared to be charmed. And, most importantly: Remember that the imperfections are part of the adventure. They make the experience all the moreTrip Stay Finder
